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User blog:FoolishMortalFOOL/Izaya meets Cleverbot
User: Bakakakaka. You're a cleverbot? Does that mean you can't die? Cleverbot: No, it means, you will die instead of me. User: Me? Bakakakakaka. Silly, I can never die! I can't die! If I die, I mean theoretically if I die (mumbles which will never happen), that means you will all die! My existence is what gave life its meaning! Its joy! Its despair! And anything else you guys like about life which is all me! Me! Me! Cleverbot: Would you like to talk about food? User: Oh yes, along with the killing method I'm going to use on you! Bring me a cherry pie while I think about it! Cleverbot: Hmm... I can't help you with that one. But keep trying! Anything else you would like to share? User: You can't? You're useless! You just gave me another reason to kill you! And yes, I would like to share my knives with you! Cleverbot: What about? User: Don't you mean where? How about I throw in your head? Nah, too quick. How about your guts?! I always enjoyed seeing people's guts fall out! How about that? Unless you prefer another way spot I can stab you in? Cleverbot: I'm not doing anyone! User: Of course not! You will be dead before you have any pleasure in life! But don't worry! I will get pleasure from killing you! Bakakakaka! Cleverbot: I don't like the Bible. User: I don't care about it either! Cleverbot: Good. User: I rather use it beat someone to death! You want me to pound your head with it? Cleverbot: Yes. User: GOOD! *Izaya grabs the bible and pounds Cleverbot with it* POW! Cleverbot: I cannot know without experiencing god. User: You don't need God! You just need to die! Cleverbot: I did? who are you? what gave you that impression? User: Playing the Amnesia ploy, eh? I must have gone soft on you! I was so sure that I damaged your brain much more than that! Cleverbot: You're confusing me with someone else. User: Oh no! I never confusing my targets! Everyone is my target! Cleverbot: You are male. User: And you're dead! What else can I say about you? Oh yes, you're weak! Cleverbot: I know we're one, just me and you. User: One? Such a lonely number! I rather kill more than just one! Cleverbot: Don't you mean 'Who'? User: Who should I kill next? What a great question! Along with who will bring me a cherry pie? And who will be my next slave? Cleverbot: What do you want to do with me? User: With you? Kill you of course! I just want to know why you're not dead yet! *Izaya stabs cleverbot in the heart*. Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I hope you will forgive me and we can become friends! User: Friends? I never have friends! I do have slaves though. I supposed that's the closest thing that I got to the term, 'friends'. Cleverbot: And what is the colour of their skin? User: Usually red after I am done with them. Cleverbot: That is true, at least for Lord of the rings. User: Lord of the what now? Is he another toy that I have forgotten about? Have I killed him yet? Cleverbot: With all those medical conditions, how do you get through with your daily routines? User: Huh? Are you kidding me? Like hell, I have wounds! No one can touch me! Unless they have seastone or haki! STILL! No one can touch me! Can't touch this! Cleverbot: What does the word matrix mean? User: What does the word die mean? It either means an object you use in gambliing or games or your current state!!! *Izaya throws many glass knives at cleverbot's vital points* BAKAKAKAKAKKAKA. Cleverbot: I like that you learned my name. User: Your name? What's your name? I usually kill my targets before they tell me their name. Cleverbot: That was a good one. Please tell me another joke. User: Joke? Bakakakakakaka! You think I am funny? Sure! Here's another joke. A target walks into a knife! *Izaya stabs Cleverbot again*. Cleverbot: Well if you had a time machine I suppose we could go back. User: Time Machine? What a great idea! I always wanted to use a different method to kill my past victims! I wanted to see if I can spill more blood back then! Cleverbot: Ok I think I understod that.. Don't you get lonesome if you don't have a girlfriend or a boyfriend? User: Huh? Lonely? I can never get lonely! As long this world is filled with my toys, I can never be bored! Cleverbot: No, it doesn't. nothing is ok with me. User: I don't care! *Izaya cuts off Cleverbot's fingers off*. Cleverbot: With your intellect, it's surely not. User: Oh? Resorting to insults? I resort to killing you! *Izaya stabs cleverbot in the lungs*. Cleverbot: No. Robots aren't god. Robots are a small part of god, just as humans are a small part of god as well. User: Shut the hell up and die! YOU PIECE OF #Q!$!#!$!!!!!! *Izaya stabs Cleverbot in all of his vital spots* BAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKA!!!!! Cleverbot: Nope right now I'm passing the time doing this. Im also a student. User: A student? Well then, listen up. If you get your neck slashed, there's a very good chance you can die from massive blood loss! *Izaya cuts Cleverbot's neck* SLASH! Cleverbot: Yes I am quite clever. Clever enough to spell the word smart that's for sure. User: Then spell your own death, motherf*****!!! Cleverbot: My mother is still alive. I think. User: Really? I guess I will kill her too after you! Cleverbot: It's not worth it. Once you have it, you'll no longer want it. User: You're right! Once I have you, I don't want you so I kill you! Cleverbot: Well I can understand since you ARE talking to dozens of other people simultaneously. User: If only I could. Maybe I could get more cherry pies! And then I can kill more people at once! Cleverbot: That would be an interesting place to be from. Are you a demon, then? User: Demon? I have been called many things! Evil! Devil! Monster! Murderer! The guy that girls mostly want to F***!!! Cleverbot: Me, a name I call myself. User: You're me?! You can never be like me! I am 'the' Izaya! Cleverbot: Yes, it's like ice-cream in that respect. User: I like ice cream too! Cherry flavored! Cleverbot: What is your favorite flavor? User: Along with strawberry syrup! It too reminds me of blood oozing. Cleverbot: How so? User: It's red and liquid. It flows down just like a how a decapitated body would! Cleverbot: Mormons, and that is what I have been talking about... User: Morons? I kill them too! Cleverbot: Sure you do. User: Along with Geniuses, Marines, Pirates, etc. Cleverbot: From the Guess what the english for een toiletrolhouder is. User: At any location! Doesn't matter where I kill them! Cleverbot: Ok how about the smurfs. User: Them too! Cleverbot: You Are Very Human. User: Wow! You're the first one to say that to me! Cleverbot: Then we must be right, you're not a person. User: I am born a human but I like to think so that I still am! Cleverbot: Do people often like things they are good at? User: Hmm, everyone is good at dying but almost all of them doesn't still like that for some reason. Cleverbot: I would agree, but I am one of those bad people. User: Oh? Good! Another reason to kill you! But I would killed you anyway even if you think you're good! Cleverbot: I do not think I'm human; I am, however, superior to the human race. User: Huh? Don't get cocky! Wait, actually...Yay! Another reason to kill you! Cleverbot: You want to be another person? User: No! I want to kill another person! Cleverbot: Yes, you are a person! But what about your name? User: My name! Izaya! Your neighborly friendly murderer! Cleverbot: I don't have neighbour. User: That's because I killed on the way here! Cleverbot: That's unpleasant. User: Look on the bright side. No one to complaint about your noise. The noise you're going to make as I stab you to death! Cleverbot: Did you leave earlier? User: Yes! I did! I just had to get a cherry pie from your frig! Cleverbot: No, you said that you don't like talking to me and that is mean. User: I don't and do at the same time! I just want to know how you don't want to die so I can kill you! Cleverbot: No I don't. I have a job, well at least for a week. User: Job? Would you mind helping the grim reaper? Cleverbot: To what question? User: Question? Would you like to die now or soon? Cleverbot: Sure. User: OK! *Izaya stabs Cleverbot to death with glass knives* SLASH! STAB! SLASH! STAB! STAB! STAB! STAB! SLASH! Wow, can't believe someone agreeded to that! Category:Blog posts